22. Cycle Syncing with Megan Faller: How Catholic Moms can work with their natural rhythms to prevent burnout

Kelsey 0:00

Hi, Megan, thank you so much for being here. I wanted to ask you, what is cycle syncing? I think that it's something I only just heard about a few months ago. And I don't think very many moms know about it yet.

Megan 0:14

Yeah, thank you, Kelsey, I'm so excited to be here and talk to you about this. So cycles thinking is essentially just adjusting some aspect of your daily living to your hormonal phase. And so there are lots of different pieces of that, that you can choose, depending on your unique needs and your goals. So some people might cycle sync, their, you know, their diet, they might cycle sync their workouts, they might cycle sync their, their skincare, or their schedule. And so it's really being aware of your hormonal phase, and then, you know, just making those adjustments depending on what you're focusing on. That's so interesting.

Kelsey 0:55

How did you how did you get started with working with women with cycles thinking like what piqued your interest in it in the first place,

Megan 1:03

you have, you know, I try to consolidate this down, because I think these things that we're really passionate about, right, there's so many pieces there. But to try to make it a short story and give you some background. I, I, I suffered some burnout. I was like, I went through a teaching program that was really intense, right out of college pretty much and you are like thrown into a classroom with no teaching background other than like a couple of weeks in the summer. And at the same time that you're teaching full time and a high needs classroom, you are also going to school full time to for I was getting a masters and a teaching certificate at the same time. And it was a really challenging time for me. And I noticed some changes in my cycle during this time. But I didn't have the awareness to really understand what was going on or to even like, in retrospect, I should have like heeded the warning signs. And I didn't know to do that, because I had so little awareness. And then shortly thereafter, I went through an official like NFP program, it was a simple thermal method. So taking your temperature checking for mucus, and I started to track my cycle with more specific details. And I felt like something was off. And so I had already been really interested in understanding my cycle and wished I had learned that sooner in my life. So I was like interested in it. And I'm checking I'm like, I don't think this is quite making sense. And I wanted to learn more. So eventually, I decided to become a fertility care practitioner through the Creighton model. And I did that for about seven years, I went to found a fertility care center called Restore fertility care. And I worked a lot with women and couples stuff are suffering from reproductive health issues. In particular, a lot of them are struggling with infertility. And I was just really passionate about that wanting them to get the answers that they deserve about their health, and their fertility and all of these pieces that we should be giving women. And we are often really failing at providing some of this insight into understanding what's really going on and being willing to dig deeper to get to more of the root cause issue. So I did that for a long time. And then, at this time, I felt like burnout was coming on. Again, I felt really passionately work, I was kind of pushing. I've done some really big webinars with some napro medical consultants, which were wonderful. But the work there are parts of the work I really loved. But I felt like I needed to take a step back and focus on my own health and healing. And so I did that. And during this time, it was picking up pieces of, of things. So it was like this new awareness of you know, the fourth trimester and postpartum rest, which I never heard of with my first two children. And then there was something I had read about the power of like resting during your period and how they recommend that in traditional Chinese medicine, I was like, that's interesting. And so they're all these little pieces I kind of started to, to try that a little bit with my cycle. And then I was reading something one day. And it was kind of like a case study where a woman had been teaching young at risk youth, young women to chart their cycles. And it was a very loose charting of their cycles, but just to have this awareness of where they were in their hormonal rhythm. And she said that it was so empowering for these women, these young women to have this awareness that they've never had about how they changed, particularly around their period. And the statistic that she shared was that 90% of the time that these young women were are getting into trouble or making really bad decisions in their lives. It was during their period. Yeah,

Kelsey 5:08

so amazing. Isn't it? Interesting,

Megan 5:11

right. And I just and she said, once they understood that this was a hormonal pattern, that it was something that would be alleviated, you know, some of their, their critical thoughts, their sense of overwhelm this feeling of being out of control. They understood themselves, they understood, this is what happens at this time of the month, and I have a sense of control. Now I understand I'm, I have a piece about it, and I don't have to, you know, continue to do whatever, you know, kind of ways they were seeking attention or, you know, struggling to cope with things that were becoming problematic behaviors. Yeah. And it's just my mind, many

Kelsey 5:52

women can relate to that, too. I'm not crazy. I'm just having hormone.

Megan 5:57

Mattis. Exactly, yeah. And so it was really, in that moment that I thought, first saving, my thought was, I need this. And then my next thought is, we all need this, we all need this awareness. And, in particular, for me, I felt like in my work, right, as a mother, if you're passionate, if you also work in some capacity, there's a tension there. And naturally, with our hormonal rhythms, like that tension can be very high in general, at that moment, you know, just before our Cycle Start or the early days of our period. And, and then you kind of wonder, like, what am I doing? I can't, you know, you kind of question can I do this? And for me, understanding that was like, yes, like I can, there will be hard moments, there's going to be times where it feels overwhelming. But I can, I can work with it, right? I can, I can understand this. And so I really, from that point on, I thought, I want to learn more about this. And I want to share it with women. And so I always say I knew the power of my cycle to plan my family. I had, then, you know, I eventually I learned that and I eventually learned the power of my cycle to evaluate my health, right as a health report card. But at that moment, is when I realized the power of my hormones on every aspect of my daily living. And it it it only expanded from there. But it really impacts so, so much that we don't even we don't realize and we don't talk about, but we do you feel it, right. It's something that really like feel happening, and we kind of know, but until we have, were able to, you know, put words to it, or like see it and bring more awareness, I feel like it just kind of happens without us being able to support ourselves through the lows, and then also, you know, recognize and, and make use of the highs as well.

Kelsey 8:09

And that's very interesting. Now, you mentioned a little bit that it is something where women, when they're tracking are paying attention to their menstruation. But cycle seeking, if I'm correct, is also about the rest of the cycle to right, like utilizing all the different phases.

Megan 8:27

Absolutely. Yeah, it's so much more than just that low. So that is a key part of it is understanding, you know, if you have a low you, most women do, and then where it happens, usually around the end of the cycle or the beginning of the next cycle. When our there's some, you know, length of overlap there depending there's a little bit of variation. But yes, there are I've broken, there's different ways to break down the cycle. But when I looked at the research, I thought it made sense, in terms of like looking at your schedule and your work, in particular to break this cycle down into four phases. So the first phase is that what you might call a hormonal low, and that is, you know, the rest and retreat phase of the cycle. And then phase two is where your estrogen starts increasing and small amounts, and that is the easin and ramp up phase. And so you kind of like come out of the hormonal low, and then you move into Phase Three, which is the BC and connect, where it's usually more of the high, it's when your estrogen is peaking, you'll get a dose of testosterone, and you're typically feeling confident, and like you want to, you know, move and connect and communicate and you're communicating well, and then you move after that. And then at the around the end of Phase three is when ovulation happens and then you transition into Phase four, and phase four is Is the wrap of the nest phase. It's the progesterone dominant phase of your cycle. And this is a great time for more of like focused work, it's a little bit more focused on your internal world or, or you could think of it even as like, the world like closer to you, you're not as ready or desiring to be out, seeing and connecting all and doing all the things. It's a little bit more calm, like what's going on right around me. And how do I? How do I optimize that? So that's kind of a little overview of, of how the cycle is broken up with the life cycle phases.

Kelsey 10:39

I have to say what I absolutely love about this is it flips on its head so much of the way at least, I personally felt about my cycle, which was more that it was a burden, but seeing that it's also something that can be, you know, in a way a superpower, if you understand it has been such a game changer in the way I think about my body and my fertility. I absolutely love that.

Megan 11:06

Yes, and and so many women have shared that with me, that they really have only thought and this is this isn't our fault. This is the way that our cycles are talked about. They're not really talked about as cycles, it's talked about as your period. Right? And then it's talked about as like, it's a hassle. Yeah, it's a burden. And it's something to be ashamed of, you know, all of these messages from media. And we that's just kind of how I think our first kind of messaging about our cycle on our body. And then you start to understand all these other aspects and your eyes are really open to like how incredible it really is. And that we should all be appreciating and understanding ourselves and, and sharing it with others. So other women know what's going on, and they can be empowered in that same way.

Kelsey 11:56

Now, is this something that's for women in every season? Because obviously there are times of life where we aren't in cycles? But how does it differ when we're in infertile seasons, like postpartum or menopause?

Megan 12:10

Yeah, I love this question. So generally, cycle thinking is designed to be used when you are in a traditional menstrual cycle. But I think there's a lot of wisdom in in looking at different phases of life and different seasons. And kind of looking at through the lens of women in general being cyclical. And that's kind of our nature, whether whether we are hormonal, whether we are postpartum, that there are cycles, and maybe, like I kind of think of the postpartum cycle overall. And this is going to be very different from every woman hormonally. But until you return to cycles, it's kind of like a mix of a phased initially, right after birth, I think of it as a phase one, because you really need that rest and retreat, or at least most women do on some level. And then from there, it's kind of a mix to me of like a phase two in terms of work kind of, like easing in to things and you know, slowly being ready to and this could be social life too, or other aspects where you're kind of ready to like get back in to things. And at the same time, there's definitely this like steady NIS that you get in the face for your luteal phase that kind of mimics what you might feel in that extended postpartum phase as well, where you might not want to be out doing all the things even though you're feeling better, you still you know, want to focus more on what's right in front of you, right, this new baby, your home and, and how that's functioning. and that's really your core focus. And, and if there are too many things going on, it might feel overwhelming, you know, and you might, you're just more prone to being also like emotional during that time, right? Because there's a lot still trying to balance itself out hormonally, and you're in a unique hormonal place. So I did kind of in different ways, even like pregnancy, I kind of thought of myself as moving through like this cycle and different phases is going to be different for every woman, but I think it can be really helpful to think about, you know what season or what phase are you in, even if you are not in a traditional menstrual cycle, post not postpartum and men menopause, excuse me menopause is something that I would like to understand more to because I've had a number of pre menopausal or menopausal women reach out and say, I still feel some kind of cycle or rhythm even though I haven't had a period in a really long time. I'm. So I do think that there is something there. I don't know exactly what it is scientifically or hormonally. But I think that, like I said, we as women are, are cyclical, it is just kind of in our nature. And I think there's some, there's wisdom to be gained there. And to kind of reflect on,

Kelsey 15:21

that sounds really true, like, on a deep level resonates with me. It just feels like what you're saying is, so much of it is just being also so attuned to yourself, and like noticing how you feel and what the patterns are, even if you don't have like a clear cycle to tell you.

Megan 15:38

Yes, that's so much what it is. And that's what I hope all women kind of gain from this is that I can tell you, you know, what should be happening in each phase and how you're very likely to feel. But you really, it's really a process of self awareness and self discovery and self compassion and being open to what are your needs? How do you communicate them? How do you set yourself up to feel supported? Whatever phase or season you may be in?

Kelsey 16:08

That's wonderful. How has cycles thinking personally improved your life? And what have you seen in the lives of your clients?

Megan 16:15

Yeah, so for me, it gave me permission to rest permission to kind of set boundaries around rats, to not feel like I had to keep pushing and overextend. And just because I had space, you know, on my calendar, it didn't mean that I had to write say yes to something. And that's both in my work life and my personal life. And I think most of my clients would probably say the same that they just have more peace, probably more self compassion, giving their selves more grace, and then combined with those things, when you feel like okay, like, I can do this, there is a way to do it. It, it feels like sometimes it expands your possibility, right. So when I put these things in place to support me to nourish me, then these things are possible, right? And it might look different than we're told it needs to look at cetera. But they are possible.

Kelsey 17:14

Right? Yeah. And I actually want to dig in a little more into that I loved your article in The Winter edition of ember collective magazine, I was wondering if you could share with us a little more about embracing rest. This is, I know, for me, something I was always very challenged with, in the early years of motherhood, just sort of saying that I was allowed to set these boundaries, that rest was something I had, not just a need for, but a right to.

Megan 17:44

Yeah. So you know, I think we live again, in a kind of more more, more kind of culture and time. And more is not necessarily better. And I think even you know, I think this is really evident in our ideas about exercise, in part, right, that, like, we're kind of coming to this realization, I think that pushing ourselves beyond what is what we want to do, or what our body can take is not good, but it's really detrimental. And I think that shows itself in the menstrual cycle, right? Any kind of stress impacts your hormones impacts your cycle negatively in, in some, you know, way, it can impact it negatively. And so just understanding that it's okay to rest and that's bad, we've been okay to rest that we truly need this. We need this to be our strongest best self. And, yeah, I just I feel like it is such that phase one and not permission to rest, to me is what a lot of women really need, they really need that and we need to be reminded of it continually. Even when we know like, Okay, this is what I need. It's okay, we have to continue these reminders, because there's just this kind of whether it's programming or, or it's just human nature in some respects, right to to want more and to want to do more and, and there's all these wonderful things that we have ideas about and and want for our families in our lives. But we can't do it. If we are burnt out if we are overextended. We really truly need rest, to be able to be our best selves to thrive and to be able to share our gifts and the way we want to. Right

Kelsey 19:48

I think you're right. Yeah. With this idea that rest is something that we can't do, but it ends up being more costly in the long run when we don't

Megan 19:59

exactly A Yeah, and I like to think of resting in our lows, or wherever we need rest right? Is what supports us to have a high right? To have to be able to then come out of that of that phase and that moment, and to be ready to receive and to give and, and all of these beautiful things that that we can do.

Kelsey 20:25

How has this You said you've worked with, you know, so many women in tracking their cycles? How has this study affected your understanding of God and His design for women?

Megan 20:38

You know, I think it's just kind of in awe of the beauty and the wisdom of his design. And, you know, just appreciating the differences in men and women, you can't get into cycles, thinking and understanding, understanding the hormonal differences, and particularly the hormonal life of a woman, you, you learn very quickly that women are very unique, their brains are unique. The impact of estrogen in infancy, is very real and has real impacts on the way, you know, babies receive and communicate and all of these different pieces, and it's so beautiful and complex. And I think there's still so much that we don't know, and that we're still learning and that maybe we are supposed to know maybe we're not supposed to know, but just to appreciate who we are as women, how we are made, and to share that appreciation and goodness is really a huge part of of what I want to see more of.

Kelsey 21:47

Thank you so much, Megan. This has been such a great talk and so informative. I really think it's going to open up a lot of eyes of women to their own needs. And I can't thank you enough for coming on today.

Megan 22:02

You're welcome. Thank you so much for having me. Kelsey.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai